TMZ - "The Situation" is in rehab for substance abuse ... TMZ has learned. Sources tell TMZ the "Jersey Shore" star -- aka Mike Sorrentino -- has checked into an inpatient treatment program. A rep for the Situation just contacted TMZ to say they are not confirming that Mike is in rehab ... just that he "has spent the past several weeks at an undisclosed location for much needed rest and recuperation after his extensive production and appearance schedule."
File this under least shocking news ever...The guy is nearly 30 and spends his nights in "da club" from 12-4 AM...Of course he's using performance enhancing drugs...Have you seen the Jersey Shore? These guys go out, come back cook a full on meal, and go to bed, basically when I'm waking up every day...Those aren't normal hours, obviously something is up. And frankly, I don't think I want to watch if performance enhancers (cocaine, I assume) are taken out of the equation. It would be like if Major League Baseball ever took getting rid of HGH and steroids seriously. The game would be boring as shit, no more homeruns, 3-2 games all over the place. Who would watch?
The same thing with the Jersey Shore...You know what the Jersey Shore is without performance enhancers? A bunch of skinny (no more steroids) overly tan guidos sitting on couches because they're tired. Think about it, for those of you who work full time, how many times in the last year have you raged on a Friday night? A handful? Most times you grab some dinner, maybe a drink or two, and then flop on the couch, right? Is that primetime TV? Hell no.
MLB needs steroids and the Sitch needs whatever it is he's been taking (probably cocaine). I know it's not healthy, I know it's a serious problem, but he's basically being paid $5 Million a year to put up with it, its a pretty fair trade off.