(CNN) -- A 19-year-old woman was arrested for allegedly trying to sneak her husband out of prison in a suitcase, according to authorities in the Mexican Caribbean state of Quintana Roo. According to officials at the prison in the city of Chetumal, the state's capital, the woman identified as Maria del Mar Arjona was caught as she was leaving the prison, pulling a black-wheeled suitcase. Authorities said that as she was walking up a staircase to leave the prison, Arjona hit the suitcase against the stairs. When something inside the bulky suitcase moved, guards noticed and stopped Arjona, who acted nervously. The guards then looked inside the suitcase and found her husband, Juan Ramirez Tijerina. Cesar Manuel Castilla, a spokesman for Quintana Roo's Department of Public Safety, says that in any case it would have been extremely difficult for the inmate to escape in the suitcase.
I think I speak for everyone when I say I take absolutely no comfort in the spokesmans words that "it would have been extemely difficult for the inmate to escape in the suitcase," because that is obviously not the case. This 19 year old woman is obviously no super criminal yet she got all the way to the staircase out of prison before getting caught because her boyfriend couldn't keep his shit together in the suite case.
How about answering why she was able to cart around a human sized suit case in the first place? There's not a policy on this? Like at the door there's not a gigantic fucking sign that says "luggage large enough to smuggle out small-framed Mexicans not allowed past this point?"
Plus how did they even get him in there without anyone noticing? I get that she was there for a conjugal visit but I've just always assumed that conjugal visit meant porno hour for prison guards. You're telling me these guys aren't behind a two sided mirror watching them go at it? What happened here? The guard go to clean himself up and she slipped this carnival act guy into the suitcase while he was searching for tissues?
And finally, what's the policy on walking prisoners back to their cell? Is this like an honor system thing down in Mexico? After the conjugal visit a guard doesn't come to take him back? You just leave it up to the convicted criminal to do the right thing?
Yea, sorry Mexico if I don't quite trust your institutional system based on the facts. It's just that here in America we don't see many cases of Samsonite based prison breaks, it's not that our criminals aren't dumb enough to think about it, its that there's just now way it would make it past zipping up the bag before someone noticed. Certainly wouldn't take until the girl was hailing a cab at the exit door.